"The only test that measures accurately your chances to get your ex back." Tried and proven by 4 million people.Start the Test
Pride in relationship: how it can ruin your relationship
Pride is something that every person should have: pride in themselves, pride in their work, pride in their family and friends, and pride in their relationship, but how can pride in relationship become a problem? How can it affect your relationship when one person has too much pride that they cannot set aside for the sake of their relationship? Pride is normally a good thing to have but we need to be very aware of its presence and prevent it from controlling the way we think, speak and act. Pride is one of your greatest assets, but it can also be your biggest downfall. Too much pride in relationship can ruin that relationship, and this article will explore how that can happen.
What are the warning signs of too much pride in relationship?
While it is something that it internal, there are some ways of identifying when a person has too much pride, things that if they apply to you, you can recognise and work on before it’s too late and it destroys your relationship.
Can you apologise?
When you do something that your partner doesn’t like or that you know is wrong, can you apologise, admit you were wrong and say you’re sorry? Or do you search for explanations and try to justify your actions? If you cannot say you’re sorry when you’re clearly wrong about something then it’s a clear indicator that you have too much pride.
Can you accept constructive criticism?
When someone advises you on how you can do something differently to be more efficient or productive, can you accept their advice with thanks? Or do you scowl, tell them they’re wrong and insist on doing things your own way even though you’re only making things more difficult for yourself? If you can’t accept the constructive criticism of other people or it makes you angry when someone knows better than you do, it’s a sign that you are too prideful.
You think you’re too good for certain tasks
D o you do your fair share around the house or do you see yourself as being too good to do certain tasks? Your partner always has to take out the rubbish and wash the dishes because you stubbornly believe that doing those things would be beneath you. You have too much pride in relationship.
Can you ask for help?
There is too much pride in relationship if you can’t ask your partner for help, even when you know you need it. You prefer to struggle along alone, taking a long time to accomplish a simple task, than ask your partner for the help they could provide.
You don’t listen
When your partner is speaking, you don’t listen to what they are saying because you don’t believe that what they have to say is important. You prefer to hear yourself speak, and you talk about yourself a lot because you are clearly the only one who has anything important to say.
When you have too much pride, you are very critical of other people, including your partner. You feel the need to put others down to raise yourself up, and you think that everybody should do things the way you do or just be more like you in general.
How pride in relationship can ruin it
When you can’t accept responsibility
When you are too prideful to accept that you were wrong or accept responsibility for your actions, you create a rift between you and your partner. They will become infuriated that you will not accept responsibility and feel hurt that you don’t care enough about them to own up to your mistakes. The more that you insist something is someone else’s fault when it is so clearly yours, the angrier your partner will become. You constantly defend yourself and your actions rather than admit that you may have been wrong. Your partner may decide that they do not want to be with someone who is so pig-headed that they cannot admit their mistakes, and end the relationship.
When you can’t apologise
It is impossible to move past mistakes made in a relationship if there is no sorrow or regret for what has been done. If you hurt your partner in any way and can’t say you’re sorry, then your partner will not be able to forgive you. There can be no forgiveness without an apology, and for as long as you refuse to apologise, you and your partner will be stuck in some in-between until your partner decides that it is not worth the aggravation. They will not be able to forgive you for hurting them because you have not apologised, and if they cannot forgive you for what you’ve done, however minor it may have been, then there is no hope for your relationship. Your pride will have killed your relationship.
Your ego can ruin any conversation. You and your partner could be having a very simple discussion; you ask them how their day was and they get one sentence out before you launch into a long-winded tale of how well you did and how you saved the day at the office today, and how nobody there does any work but you; you practically do everybody’s jobs and they would all be lost without you.
The first part of this is that you don’t listen to what your partner has to say. You view what your partner has to say as insignificant and unimportant in comparison with what you have to offer. You don’t treat your partner as an equal, and no one would be willing to stay in a relationship where they are constantly put down and made to feel inferior. Your partner will feel ignored, and it won’t be long until they get sick of this and put an end to the relationship.
The second part is that you constantly talk about yourself, your own accomplishments and how great you are. Nobody wants to hear your life story, nobody cares. And this will make you seem so conceited that people will avoid ever entering into a conversation with you, your partner included. It will make them tune out whenever you start to speak because they know it will be the same old story over and over again. Your arrogance will kill any interest your partner had in you and any affection they had for you and you will have only yourself and your pride to blame.
Relationship, not dictatorship
Too much pride in relationship will make you completely unbearable. Your partner will constantly feel put down, quashed by your giant ego. They will feel inferior because you will treat them like you own them, like you’re better than them and so they should do everything that you say. Pride can shift the delicate balance in a relationship that is necessary for it to be a partnership rather than one person dictating everything the other should say and do.
You will be closed off
Pride in relationship will make you closed off to new experiences because you won’t accept the advice or suggestions of your partner or other people. If your pride will not allow you to accept some good advice and experience new things simply because it wasn’t you who suggested them, then you and your partner are going to get bored very quickly, stuck in a rut and not going anywhere or ever trying anything new. Your pride will cause boredom in the relationship, which is a great way to send your partner running. It won’t be long until your partner can’t bear your ego always getting in the way of you trying new things together as a couple and will end the relationship.
An elevated opinion of yourself
Your pride means that you will have an elevated opinion in yourself, an elevated sense of self-importance. In a relationship, your partner should be your number one priority, the person you turn to for aid, the person you ask for advice, and with whom you always consult before you make any big decisions. If you have this pride and self-importance, your partner’s opinions will become insignificant to you and you will find yourself making decisions that affect you both without talking to your partner about them. Your partner may put up with this for a little while, but after a time they will become sick of their thoughts and feelings not being taken into account, sick of their opinions being ignored. Your partner will not stay with you for very long if they feel like you love yourself more than you love them.
When you have too much pride and an elevated opinion of yourself, you may not even wait for your partner to become annoyed with your incredible ego; you may end up deciding yourself that you’re too good for your partner and ending the relationship… and then later regretting it.
You will be critical
When you have too much pride, you will be very critical of everything your partner says and does. Nothing they do is right, nothing they do can meet your impossible standards because they can never do something as well as you can. It won’t be long until your partner gets sick of this impossible scrutiny. They will not appreciate being constantly made to feel inferior and criticised about everything from the way they look to their handwriting. This may even start to feel like verbal abuse to them if you’re always putting them down, and they will not put up with it for long. In a relationship, you should feel appreciated and respected at all times, and pride greatly interferes with the respect you can have for another person. When your partner grows tired with your lack of appreciation and respect for them, they will not hesitate to end the relationship. People want to be with someone who will pick them up, not someone who will constantly put them down and criticise them.
How to let go of your pride
Pride in relationship can well and truly destroy that relationship, but only if you let it. If you can identify your pride before it’s too late then there are things you can do to work on it and ensure it doesn’t cause the destruction of your relationship.
Practice apologising, forgiving and letting go
Make an effort not to let your pride get in the way. If you make a mistake, swallow your pride and force yourself to acknowledge that mistake and apologise for it. If your partner was the one to make the mistake, forgive them. Don’t hold on to the mistake and use it against them in the future. Make an effort to let go of these things and not give in to your pride for the sake of your relationship.
Give up your need for control
While you may feel like you need to be in complete control, you don’t. Find a way of accepting that you can’t dictate every little thing in your life or your partner’s. Trust your partner and yourself, and ensure that you are equals in the relationship. Consult your partner about any decisions that you have to make and ask for their help if you need to. You do not necessarily have to relinquish all your pride to ask for help. Everybody needs help at one time or another and there is no shame in asking for it.
Don’t take yourself too seriously
Remember that just because you have a fancy job or house, that doesn’t make you any better or worse than anyone else. When you start to feel too prideful or think something is beneath you, let go of that thought, and make a point of completing the task that you thought was so demeaning to bring you back down to earth. Don’t be afraid to laugh at yourself and admit that you don’t know everything. Having pride can be a great thing as long as it is the right kind of pride. When it becomes so strong that it turns into arrogance, this is when pride in relationship has the potential to ruin that relationship.Antoine Peytavin, fondateur du site jerecuperemonex.com