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My ex wants to hang out : All the tips here
You’ve just got a message : my ex wants to hang out.
And they are asking if you want grab a coffee this week.
What do you do?
What does it mean when my ex wants to hang out?
Do they miss you?
Do they want you back?
Sure your mind races, with so many questions.
And it hard to know what to think.
Let alone what to do.
If an ex significant other asks you out again,
It can put you in an unexpected position.
You may have thought it was over and been very happy about that moved on and all.
Or maybe you have missed them.
Remember that no matter how you feel or felt about them.
Asking you to meet again was probably a difficult thing for them because of your shared history.
The most important thing to keep in mind is doing what feels right for you.
While maintaining a kind attitude whenever possible to this person.
Some people just can’t understand other’s ardor for staying « friends » with exes.
If there was any passion, heat, and seriousness during the romantic relationship.
There is bound to be a certain amount of anger, bitterness, and regret in the aftermath.
And that is usually not a good start from which to launch a friendship.
« Laughter is not a bad beginning for a friendship, » Oscar Wilde said – right, as usual.
Most friendships begin with laughter and just enjoying someone’s company.
Someone says something you find funny, you think « Hey, that’s my kind of gal/guy. »
Whereas friendships with exes had histories that began in tears.
To some, an ex is someone they have let your guard down with and showed insecurities to.
Having them in your life meant being constantly reminded of your own vulnerability and in the end some failings.
So the minute most people break up with someone, they cut ties and out of their life completely.
They say the amount of time it takes to get over an ex is at least as long as the relationship lasted.
I agree with that it may not be true for everyone.
Once this period has passed, you’ll feel indifferent toward your ex romantically.
The opposite to love is not hate but indifference.
And may find yourself compelled to be friends once again.
Which can go to show how you can really preserve the connection without sex and dating.
You never know when you may need help or emotional support.
And your ex probably knows you better than lots of your friends.
So it is good idea to keep them close and your enemies closer.
This idea goes both ways, too.
You can help your ex make important decisions in their lives.
And you can listen attentively to their existential troubles.
You have been involved but that does not have to mean you are getting involved again.
Your shared history can be like the reference library of information to help them get an objective opinion.
Besides it feels nice to be able to help someone, especially if you have been a couple.
Is shows a maturity and a progression in moving on with your lives.
Staying friends with your ex in this way can help you in your future relationships.
Before you begin to hang out with your ex there are some things you need to do.
You have to make sure that you are the best version of yourself confident level headed and cool.
I am not talking about Fonzie cool I am talking about emotionally cool.
That the feelings you may have experienced after the break up are gone.
Feelings like anger frustration denial and even desperation.
And that you need to show that you are happy with the life you’re creating for yourself.
This especially goes for anyone hoping to get back together with an ex.
Relying on your gut or your instincts is important in matters of the heart.
Especially when it comes to deciding whether or not to give someone a second chance.
Take stock of your feelings about the situation and the person and your last situation together.
Try to determine how you feel about them before you decide to go any farther.
Try also to think about how you feel about meeting them again.
If your instincts are making you feel uneasy about the situation, don’t take this lightly.
Reigniting an old flame can be hard work.
So don’t jump into something if your heart seems to be telling you to be cautious.
Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.
My ex wants to hang out : here are some tips
Dress well but do not go all out.
It could be seen as having motivations that can be misconstrued they could misinterpret your intentions.
They may think you did it for them to get them back.
They could think you did it to make them jealous.
Be calm and patient
Remaining calm at all times regardless of how they may try or inadvertently push your buttons.
Is a show of maturity and level headedness that goes a long way to being the bigger person.
My ex wants to hang out be friendly
Though it may be hard don’t be bitter and closed up towards your Ex.
You need to be friendly to your ex friend which means you need to be warm and inviting.
This sets up a good start to your relationship.
Don’t bring up old problems and issues
If it is over then it is over make sure you are over it.
Don’t bring up old wounds.
There is no need for an autopsy.
Unless you are considering this an opportunity to start the relationship again.
Then put those issues to one side for discussion at a later date.
This first meeting probably is not the right time to try sort them out.
If You need to find the ways to get over a bad relationship ending then it is best you don’t meet.
That means you need to move on and forget the old problems that makes the situation tense.
My ex wants to hang out : don’t bring up their weakness or mistakes
Everybody makes mistakes and no one is perfect.
When in a relationship, you are voluntarily exposed to every part of their being and vice versa.
Because they trust you at that time, you need to keep that trust even after it is over.
Which means you need to not use their weakness against them even now.
This it about being mature and grown up about that.
Remember the good times
Remembering the good times will bring a smile in both of your faces.
This works well for those looking to relight that spark in an old flame.
This also lets you remember yours and hers common ground which can spark connection.
My ex wants to hang out stay away from the Relationship topic
Don’t talk about recurring dates or future relationships it is just hanging out.
This could still be a touchy topic for the both of you and will create a weird vibe.
This can be possibly painful for both of you so it is best avoided.
Don’t ask to get back together again
Asking about getting back together at a first coffee since the break up is not a good idea.
Even though it may have crossed both of your minds.
It will make you seem desperate, weak and possibly unstable.
Doing this will also eliminate any chances on hanging out together again.
Or starting again if that is on your mind further down the line.
Don’t boast or brag about your life
Don’t try to boast about your career, friends or about your life in general.
They will know that you are only doing this to make them jealous and get back at them.
It will go to show that you are not really over them and you still harbor strong feeling.
Chances are you will bore them with hearing about it too.
My ex wants to hang out listen Intently to what they have to say
Listening intently to what they have to say as they may have serious life changes to discuss.
When you are hanging out together is a must.
Intent listening will create a comfortable and safe space for any person.
It shows a mature ability to have bilateral communications rather than self interested monologues.
Stay open minded
Being open minded about how the vibe and course the conversation takes when hanging out is important.
It will keep the hangout interesting and fluid it also shows an openness in you.
This is an important things to do when hanging out with your ex partner.
My ex wants to hang out again keep things casual
Don’t expect too much remember it is just hanging out.
It is not an invitation to a wedding for you both.
My ex wants to hang out is meant to only be a casual meet up.
This should be the time to simply hang out together as friends.
And lay back relaxed in a non pressurized environment.
Do something new together
Try something new together perhaps not in the coffee shop you broke up in.
Revisiting that kind of painfully shared place will no doubt be marred in both of you minds.
Meeting some place new that is without a shared history means it is neutral to you both.
And therefore will have no unpleasant associations for either of you in it.
This will create the possibility of new connections and it will further the conversations.
My ex wants to hang out bring someone with you
If it is too uncomfortable, having someone with you can maintain neutrality and keep the peace.
If that is a concern for you is a good course of action to take.
This can minimize awkwardness and the tense atmosphere between you two.
Though if it is that awkward for you consider not going it may end up being too painful.
Do the things you know you both will enjoy
Remember the things you used to do together simply because it’s fun?
The activity can be bowling indoor climbing whatever you both liked to do, do it again.
Bring them a friendly gift
You could bring them food something you could both share.
Or other neutral things that doesn’t imply romance.
This can be a nice gesture to show no hard feelings and maturity.
My ex wants to hang out get to know each other again
Use this time to be curious about each other again.
Especially if you have been apart for a long time.
It will show genuine interest a friendliness on your part.
Forget your shared painful past
Forget the past completely so you can start anew.
So this is not a topic for conversation it is best avoided.
Be Better than you were before
Remember your own past mistakes.
Perhaps you had issues listening or allowing them to talk.
Use this new opportunity to actually create a better neutral relationship with your ex.
Show how you realized your mistakes and how you have changed that behavior for the better.
Remember you aren’t trying to make each other jealous
When you don’t try to outdo each other’s life.
Or try to make each other jealous with the new things happening in your life.
This means you know that the friendship is heading to a good path.
This is because the relationship is now based on pure curiosity for friendship.
If it doesn’t hurt to talk about the past then you both are in a better place
When you reminisce the past again it could be painful for either of you.
Whether it is the good parts or even the bad parts.
If you both don’t wince or feel hurt, it means there is no residual issues from the break up.
Not hurting means you have fully moved on and ready for a new chapter in your life.
You And Her Want To Hang Out More
Both of you initiate more hangouts it is a good sign for a friendship or more to develop.
Because you feel like the current hang out is actually good for the both of you.
My ex wants to hang out they genuinely want to stay in your life
Now they want to stay in your life because they feel it is safe enough to make a place for you back in there life.
My ex wants to hang out : quick tips
- Don’t have any expectations.
- Be there for them whatever that means to them.
- Be kind.
- Avoid confrontation.
- Keep the goodbyes short and sweet.
Antoine Peytavin, fondateur du site jerecuperemonex.com