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I want my ex girlfriend back


Yes, I want my ex girlfriend back.

OK you broke up.

The who what and why you did break up means little now.

When you say I want my ex girlfriend back.

The only thing that matters now is how to go about getting her back.

So I hear you say I want my ex girlfriend back how do I get her back ?

 

First thing to realize that obviously there were issues that caused the break up.

These have to be recognized and dealt with.

In a way that shows progress and development.

With that I mean you can show that they are no longer a barrier to the relationship.

If they are issues on her end.

Then they will obviously be harder to deal with.

But you can show an understanding of them in order to help allay those fears or issues.

 

The other thing is I want my ex girlfriend back is your decision.

But that does not mean you can automatically get her back.

It will take work, maybe a lot of hard work.

Is it something you are committed to with all you heart ?

Along those lines are you sure, you are sure .

 

Are you doing this for the right reasons ?

Are you sure she is the one you want .

Are you motivated by fear of being alone or that you think you will not find someone else.

I only ask because these are things that go through many people’s minds after a break up.

And can lead them to make the same mistakes.

Putting them back into the same situation.

 

So if you are sure we will move on.

 

The next thing is I am going to tell you things that may seem to be wrong to your mind.

Or maybe from your hearts perspective.

Trust me neither of them are giving you good advice right now.

They are throwing out ideas like leaves in autumn.

You need to be calm, collected and follow a plan of action.

At times this plan may seem like no action at all.

 

I want my ex girlfriend back now, no Be patient.

 

This goes for the approach that you take right now.

And you are committed in saying  “I want my ex girlfriend back”.

I guess a thought has crossed your mind how to get her back.

A way by running to her pledging undying love.

Falling at her feet begging for her return.

Even just telling her you love her now.

That won’t work believe me it won’t.

It seems like it would.

It’s very appealing in a romantic and dramatic way, but it will fail.

 

She needs to be given time to get over the break up and be given time to miss you.

In this time and space you are still working on the plan.

Just not in a obvious and direct way.

That will be apparent to her or anyone else.

 

I want my ex girlfriend back I want it to work. For you this means working out.

 

This is about making her an offer she can’t refuse.

Working out will give you time to think.

About possibly what went wrong and how to fix it.

It will take you mind off thinking about being alone right now .

Like everyone including the ex does after the end of a relationship.

 

It will help to replace the lost feel good endorphins that come from being in a loving relationship.

And it will temporarily substitute them with feel good endorphins from a workout.

It will also make you look better and feel better about yourself.

And that is what you want her to see. When she eventually does.

Someone who is looking good, better than she remembered.

Someone who is confident and feels good in their own skin.

Someone who is not a wreck of a guy.

Broken after a break up.

 

Everyone goes through some level of feeling loss, pain and loneliness after a break up.

Its normal and what makes us human.

What you want to show is that you are a survivor.

That it would take bigger things, than a break up to bring you down.

 

Eat Well

 

This will also feed into (get it ?) the previous point about working out.

Eating well will also create a healthy glow.

That will add to the air of a person who is at the top of their game.

Not in the pits on the bench or worse still being carted off on a stretcher.

 

I know there is a cliche the guys after a relationship ends will live the single life to the max.

All weekend benders of alcohol and rebound relationships.

I digress.

Sure you may have indulged the senses.

In whatever, eating healthy can help to overcome the overdone look.

 

It also is basically good for you.

So it’s a benefit like working out, so it’s a no brainer.

Hungover eyes can  look like you have been crying.

And that’s not not the look you are looking to present.

 

Be Social, Don’t sulk

 

I know i said about the cliches about guy going out and getting tanked up on a bender weekender.

This is different.

You shouldn’t need to be picked up off the floor in a drunken stupor.

This is about being seen out and about living the life.

You can be the life of the party and have the time of your life, if you are in control.

As long as it doesn’t appear  you are drowning your sorrows.

 

It is about still being the strong confident lively survivor of a break up.

That has not broken you into tiny pieces.

In the immediate aftermath of the break up it could be true that you feel like crap.

Broken without the will to live, almost

But that is not the face that is shown to the world or the ex either.

It is about creating value in you and making her think that you may not have valued the relationship as much as she might have thought.

 

It sounds deceitful and it is a little.

A little white lie I’m sure is something she has indulged in at some time or another.

 

So be social get out and about have fun like the adverts for drinks say “Responsibly”.

This can all be fed into the social media network of your choice.

Or even of her choice but just not obviously directed at her.

If that avenue has not been blocked or unfriended.

But you know that really won’t stop her seeing what you are up to.

If she really wants to.

 

You should be showing a portrait of someone who is living the life upbeat not beat up.

Doing a variety of social things some new some familiar.

All without a hint of sulking or the appearance of regret over a relationship that ended.

Or like someone who would say I want my ex girlfriend back…

But you do.

 

Find new hobbies

 

You could show extra personal development to add extra value.

By taking up something new that you have never done before.

It will go that extra mile to show that you could be moving on with your life.

And not stagnating after the end of the relationship.  

It will show her that there are things she didn’t know about you.

There is still some new facets to your personality that she will not have realised.

This may tell her that perhaps she really didn’t know you as well as she thought.

This does two things it shows you in a different light.

As in you are doing new things.

And making her think maybe she was wrong about you and the break up.

 

I want my ex girlfriend back so cut off all communications

 

Depending on who did initiate the break up will determine the amount of time you should do what is commonly called a no contact period.

If she did I would say it is nearly compulsory and should be a least four weeks.

If you initiated the break up then you can still do it.

It will do no harm.

It means you don’t call her you don’t text her you don’t email her absolutely no contact whatsoever.

No accidentally bumping into her where she works or the places she likes to eat.

 

Absolutely no contact.

 

This creates a sense of curiosity about you.

And why you are not in contact.

It will also let the heated feelings from the end of the relationship cool.

And let her warm to you again while she misses your contact.

For her to become more nostalgic in temperament towards you.

 

The length of time can vary from twenty one days to six months.

But the latter is an extreme end of the scale.

Three weeks can be enough if its done with absolute commitment.

Consider more time if she initiated the break up.

Four to six weeks is ample.

 

This time is well used doing the things like working out, eating well and socializing etc.  

Things that you should be already doing.

It is important to give her the time and space.

To let the pain of the break up give way to missing you.

This once again will seem like the wrong thing to do

Your mind may be screaming I want my ex girlfriend back.

This isn’t going to work I am going to lose her for good.

That kind of panic thinking will lead you to rush her or even worse to rush to her.

 

Be patient.

 

Don’t let her see you

 

I know I have said throughout this article show her this and show her that about you.

This was meant by proxy and not directly.

By posting on social media but not pointed directly at the ex.

Through word of mouth by friends of friends.

You know they will.

You really should not see her in person, until you are ready.

She should be ready too and she may let you know if and when she is.

This is the object of this exercise.

You are going to be totally ready and prepared for this moment.

It can not be rushed.

 

Fail to prepare is prepared to fail.

 

And you don’t want that.

You are saying I want my ex girlfriend back

 

Get New Friends

 

You may have fears about this way of going about getting her back.

It can seem to be going about it the wrong way.

Not contacting her.

Acting like she doesn’t exist.

And now I suggest you make new friends.

But I want my ex girlfriend back!

Yeah it’s all about the little white lie of moving on.

Or at least the appearance of doing so.

New friends will seem to her that you are.

But really it’s just a ploy.

Sure you can have fun meet new people.

But this doesn’t change the objective you have and only you know.

I want my ex girlfriend back.

It’s about making you seem out of reach.

Making her think you are not available anymore.

We all know about wanting something we can’t have.

It adds impetus to the absence she will already feel.

 

I want my ex girlfriend back in my life. Let Her Contact You

 

If you do properly and completely the no contact period.

There is a good chance she will contact you.

Remember curiosity killed the cat.

During the no contact period she will have gotten over any possible anger and negative feelings.

And progressed into remembering the tender feelings about the relationship and you.

When she does contact you , or even if you have to contact her.

You will look better you will have more to talk about.

Without having to talk about your shared past and the relationship that is over.

Initially you should avoid this as a topic of conversation, unless she brings it up.

 

After a couple of social meetings (not dates) as ex’s and just friends.

You should not rush straight to the point.

Just be friends who have history.

 

You should be gauging the level of her interest and receptiveness to you.

I mean if she gives you the time to meet this is a very positive sign.

This is when you can slowly and gently start to work on the object of your plan.

Read her body language look for eye contact does she fix her hair.

Look for signs she is flirting.

 

A touch of her hand. If returned, that is a very positive sign to continue with the approach.

You will get a sense of how you plan is working.

Don’t have expectations of a reunion overnight.

This can lead to disappointments.

Be patient take it slow and that is how you will get your ex girlfriend back.

 

 

 

Antoine Peytavin, fondateur du site jerecuperemonex.com

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