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5 ways to know how to win your ex back after being dumped


How to win your ex back after being dumped is not that hard really.

All it takes is some care time and effort on your part.

To show them why they went out with you in the first place.

How to win your ex back after being dumped will mean getting control.

Controlling you heart and mind from being your own worst enemy.

 

When I say your heart and mind are being your own worst enemy.

What I mean is that when you get dumped your mind gets flooded.

Flooded with heated thoughts and emotions.

And when you add to that the want or need to get your ex back.

It can add a sense of urgency that will lead to making mistakes.

Add haste to make waste.

 

You may want to rush back to them.

Professing your undying love and begging them to take you back.

It can seem like the right thing to do in your mind.

And to most people in the same position it would too.

But perhaps not your ex they may see it differently.

They may see someone who approaches reeking of neediness insecurity and desperation.

Not a winning look in anyone eyes is it ?

It won’t help in how to win your ex back after being dumped.

 

So the first thing to learn is that OK you may feel a bit like panicking at the moment.

That is natural you have been through a breakup and that is rough.

It is rough on anyone including you and your ex.

That panic should not lead you to think or act rashly.

That is the mistake of being led by your emotions.

And your emotions are not the thing to be led by at this moment either.

 

So first off you should achieve some measure of calm.

This will be necessary to aid you in your quest to win back the love of your life.

But really it will be very helpful to you throughout your road to reunion.

 

Think about it this way OK you two did break up.

But at the same time you did date each other.

So there must be some attraction between you two.

So if you know that much that is probably half the battle.

There are mistakes that will be corrected or fixed.

So in reality there is no real need to panic or act rashly.

 

How to win your ex back after being dumped #1 Understanding

Increase your chances without neediness, insecurity and desperation.

That usually come with a breakup.

Studies have made on the psychology of Love itself.

And determined that it can often be precipitated by fear.

Fear like love makes the heart beat faster.

And  it has a deeply psychological and physiological reactions.

 

If you are going to get your ex back you can not be guided by fear.

Being guided by fear will have you acting needy by calling them every minute of the day.

Texting at every opportunity and trying to see them to convince them to get back with you.

This will have the opposite effect on your ex.

They will what to have nothing to do with you.

They may want a restraining order put on you.

It will seem like you are harassing them.

And that is not the approach you need to take.

 

The usual reaction to a breakup is a mixed bag of emotions.

Ranging from anger frustration love and regret.

They need to be controlled and can not factor in to your efforts.

These will destroy any chances you have of getting your ex back.

 

You need to understand the reasons for the breakup.

You also need to understand your part or role in the split.

This will help in the reconciliation of the relationship.

By correcting those mistakes to the best of your ability.

This will show your ex your ability to change and grow.

And that is an essential part of the groundwork.

You need to do in order to show progress after the separation.

 

Studies have identified communication issues as one of the top reasons for couples therapy.

As well as being one of the top reasons for break-up and divorce.

Whatever the issues in your relationship that led to the split face them and counter them.

Show that they will not be an obstacle to a relationship in the future.

 

How to win your ex back after being dumped #2 Radio Silence

Have no contact with your ex for a period of three weeks to a month.

This means respecting their wishes and giving them a breakup they wanted.

Putting some time and space between you two may seem counter intuitive.

But remember that is your emotions trying to guide you.

Guiding you to act insecure needy and desperate.

 

Be calm be patient be cool act like you are confident and secure.

No contact means what is says.

You can have no contact.

No electronic contact by phone email or text.

That includes any social media accounts or internet messengers either.

No hanging out in their favorite spot to bump into them.

Nothing, Nada, none.

 

Right now your emotional responses are going to be telling you that is not the way.

That is not how to win your ex back after being dumped.

No its not really but it is allowing time for you and them to get over the emotions.

The negative emotions that are currently associated with you in the aftermath of the split.

 

If you push them to meet you and talk things over.

Which is what your mind is probably saying is the best thing.

You will both be feeling anxious from the split and that will cloud your judgement.

You may be pushing for a second chance and they will be looking to push back.

That means pushing you away.

 

The other reason for no contact is for the negative emotions to give way to nostalgic ones.

After a break up everyone feels lonely and sad about the loss.

This can work to your benefit if you let it.

Sure your mind is probably saying what if they meet someone new.

It will be a rebound relationship that may not last.

And they have to find that out for themselves.

You have to remain calm about the fact that they may date someone.

 

This will make you seem secure and confident in your own skin.

And that is a very attractive quality to many people.

Don‘t give them the reaction they may be expecting you to have which is jealousy.

That will show you are not over them and you still have strong feelings for them.

 

How to win your ex back after being dumped #3 Focus on yourself

During no contact be the best you can possibly be.

Think about when you first started going out together.

Think of the things that attracted them to you.

 

You have got to use this time of no contact to be better that when they first met you.

Hit the gym hard and buff the body.

This has been shown to help sufferers of depression feel better in themselves.

And after a breakup most people will feel some thing like that.

Besides it is a great distraction from thinking about them and the breakup.

It also is just a way of looking after yourself in this time of need.

 

Upgrade your wardrobe.

Getting some new clothes is another way to beat the breakup blues.

And to help you in looking good and feeling good.

Perhaps get a hair cut change the style.

This revamp of your image will look different to the ex.

It can look like you are getting on with your life.

And this is the impression that you want to give.

 

Before you try to get your ex back, you need to learn to enjoy your life without your ex.

You need to prove to yourself that you can be happy without your ex.

Indulge yourself in the single life.

Socialize meet up with friends and family.

Do the things you may not have had the opportunity to do while in a relationship.

Having some fun will be the last thing your ex will expect you to have.

They will be expecting you to be a blubbering mess broken and discarded.

 

When you don’t do as they expect they will question their value in your eyes.

As in how can you seem so not so broken up by the breakup?

This has the effect of showing them you are an attractive, happy person during this time.

You need to take a step back and reevaluate your life.

You should make some positive changes in your life.

You ex will start to wonder what you are up to that you have not been in contact.

And that is a good thing for you that means they will be more receptive when the time comes to get in contact again.

 

How to win your ex back after being dumped #4 Contact

Contact your ex at the right time with an appropriate message.

Not drunk in the middle of the night with a message that reads “What’s up?”.

That’s a waste of your time and theirs.

When it comes to reaching out to your ex, if they have not already done so.

The best way to spark their interest is through text messages.

You don’t want to call them right away.

Texting them can be read and answered at their leisure.

Giving you time to think and check your messages for any unwanted negativity.

 

There is not the tension of a phone call.

Where you could catch them at a bad time.

Or  where you or they could react badly.

Or even say something that will recall the breakup.

And all the negative emotions associated with that.

 

Better to let them build attraction in their mind.

Before you two talk on the phone.

They will be picturing you as they last saw you or as you first met.

Hopefully that is not how you will look to them when you eventually meet.

You will be better than they remembered.

 

What kind of text should you send them?

When you’re breaking the ice and contacting them again.

The best kind of text is one that gives them a reason why you’re texting them.

Perhaps peak their interests by referencing a sport or team they follow.

Or perhaps a TV show you know they watch.

This also plants the seed of nostalgia in their mind for the relationship you two had.

Another way to do that is to tell them about something positive that happened in your life.

That reminded you of them.

And you should have some to choose from you time and work during no contact.

This bypasses all the relationship talk.

And reminds them of how it was fun to chat with you.

Avoiding any relationship talk is essential it is a no go zone for a topic.

 

How to win your ex back after being dumped #5 Phone

After a period of chatting by text you should progress to phone calls.

These phone calls should not be too long.

Leave the conversation before a lull occurs.

This will leave them wanting more.

It will also encourage them to want to meet you in person.

And that is your goal.

 

To meet with your ex to rekindle the attraction, connection and trust they once had with you.

For the first couple of meetings you should not rush to suggest dating again.

You may not even know whether or not they are single.

You should be meeting up as friends albeit friends with history.

You should be reminding them of the good times you had together.

 

Be prepared for the worst as they may be dating someone.

Don’t let this provoke you into a reaction.

Be calm, cool and patient.

Being negative at this point would show them that they made the right decision.

To breakup in the first place.

Be polite respectful and back off it may mean a slight delay.

In the plans of how to win your ex back after being dumped.

It could be a rebound relationship it could be a white lie to gauge your reaction.

Don’t burn your bridges.

 

If they are not dating you could ask to meet again a couple of times.

And then get to the « talk » about a relationship.

 

Antoine Peytavin, fondateur du site jerecuperemonex.com

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